Thursday, February 16, 2012

Receiving Love


Do I sometimes wonder if Jesus will orphan me... if one day, I’ll just stop hearing from Him and be left wondering if I can ever win him back? Will I feel powerless as he drifts away, disinterested, or disappointed in me? Of course, He’s saying "no" today. This morning, Father is saying to me, “The thing I need you to believe is that I love you, you are my child, I fashioned you, and there’s no way in the world that I will abandon you.” John 14 (a faithful companion the last few months) says as much: “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you… If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him and we will come to him and make our home with him.”

I know all this stuff. But God keeps saying it to me every time I open my ears. I guess I don’t fully believe it yet. And something tells me he’ll still be asking me to believe His love when I’m old.

His love has been piercing the leathery layers of my defenses for years. And even though today it makes me cry like a baby, I know it still hasn’t totally taken over my heart. And I know it’s no good to me unless I receive it.

I imagine myself receiving some random act of kindness from a friend. At first, I sneer inwardly, and demand the chance to do it for myself. Over time, my response becomes an embarrassed refusal of his kindness. Eventually, I let him serve me but try to pay him back. After he refuses, I let him serve me but formulate a backup plan in case he withdraws his love. With Jesus, I hope someday I can move beyond those responses and feel the safety to lay my head on his shoulder, close my eyes, and just let him be nice to me. In fact I fancy that my primary “work” each morning in my devotional time is to simply allow him to love me—none of this pursuit of holiness, spiritual discipline, or self-improvement stuff. That’s all great stuff. But before all I think about any of that, I sit alone on this couch and try to be open to His love…. displayed both on the cross and in my daily life. That trust in His love is the primary task of every Christian. Out of that simple belief flows all the personal transformation I could ever ask for. Like Augustine said, “Love God and do as you please.”

Once, after I was newly married, I reflected that Jesus’ love empowered me to love my wife. An atheist friend of mine took offense at that, imagining that I believed he was unable to fully love his wife. In hindsight, I think I was right that Jesus’ love uniquely enables people to love others. But I couldn’t know at the time how little I understood of that love. My marriage was often crippled by fears and paranoia. I was often critical and judgmental towards Debra: a “love-miser”. In fact, MANY of my relationships have been guarded and loveless. Even my relationship with Jesus sometimes looked more like a meditative quest for self-betterment than an actual relationship.

But 2 years ago, God started busting through my defenses as he embarrassed me with an extravagant dose of love from his Daddy-heart. I cried a lot after that as he started to heal old hurts. There were time I would cry at the weirdest stuff. At the same time, I started to feel this Daddy-heart beating in ME for the first time. I developed this strange parental affection for some of my friends. I started asking better questions and listening more attentively. These days when I sit down with someone, I imagine I’m putting on x-ray goggles. I imagine that I can see past their moving lips, down their esophagus, into their hearts (metaphorically speaking…. Annabel once told me, “Jesus looks into our hearts to see how much blood is in there!”). I try to remember that somewhere inside, this person is a vulnerable child just like me, that they are loved just like me. It helps me move past my anxious posturing, judging, impressing, and sizing-up to a restful place where I can begin to love that person because Jesus loves them with embarrassing extravagance… just like He loves me.

If anything, I’m starting to grasp how far I am from resting my head on His shoulder, closing my eyes, and letting Him be nice to me. It’s not a matter of being insufficient as a disciple. Rather I think I’m over-sufficient… self-sufficient.


PS- Here are a couple things that God used to bust through my heart with His love:


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