Once doubt is planted

I suppose it’s a bit late for Easter reflections. But I was thinking about Thomas’ experience of the resurrection event and the way God dealt with a doubter.

First, Thomas vocalizes his skepticism a full week before Jesus addresses his concern. Do you know how long a week is in “doubter years?” When I’ve been in the midst of a faith crisis, my outlook on life can change on a daily or hourly basis. By the end of a week, Thomas must have felt smugly justified in his doubts and cynical of the other disciples who held on to hope. I know I would. But I’m glad Thomas expressed his doubts instead of swallowing them. Even if doubt isn’t a suitable home for people (as some of my peers seem to think), it’s an important path we all have to take eventually. It takes a lot of courage to express doubt and a lot of integrity to keep plugging away at it.

But though researching the ancient texts and gathering information from others might have been beneficial to Thomas, the only person who could truly answer his doubt was Jesus himself. And out of love, Jesus goes out of his way to respond to Thomas objections on Thomas’ terms (though not on Thomas’ timeline) and then exhort Thomas to stop doubting and believe.

Jesus has this amazing way in my experience of saying, “I love you: doubts and all. Your doubts are valid. Your honesty is valuable. Now stop doubting and trust me.” Or perhaps more accurately, “I love you: doubts and all. So now you are free to rest from the road of doubt and settle in the security of belief.”

Belief is an awesome thing, but it has to be arrived at honestly. Once an idea is planted, it can’t be quenched by force of will. It must be addressed by a self-secure God who isn’t threatened by doubt. I think Jesus wanted Thomas to experience for a full week the terrifying implications of his doubt and then demonstrate that he was calm, secure, and undeniably real even in the midst of our scariest doubt.

I like that about Him.